Revealing Upset

My mother may be dying. It is a confusing time for me. I’m distracted during training sessions. Long time clients likely notice; and they would be offended if I hid such a significant personal fact from them. My calendar effects theirs and has become unreliable. Also, the students in my classes deserve an explanation for my frequent last minute employ of substitute teachers.images-1.jpeg┬áSome of these people are beleaguered by similar sadness and panic as they care for their own parents. Many of them have recently experienced it themselves and are fonts of very helpful advice and information. I could use their help; but I am like a dam about to break. Get me started and I’ll spill grief for the entire hour.

How much is too much sharing?

I usually reveal just enough of myself in a training session to foster a sense of equity and peer to peer confidentiality. After all, it’s their time, and their dime; but when you’ve talked with a client twice a week for a decade, the line between friend and professional service provider blurs. Still, there are topics and emotions that ought to remain unspoken.

What criteria do you use to govern the depth or scope of what you reveal?


Health Club Administration


A family run club often has the difficulties of a disjointed command, as owners disagree about aspects of their operation; and this may confuse employees. There may be problems arising from nepotism or favoritism; but I prefer that to working for a corporation. When I became Coordinator of the Pilates Department at the Bay Club Marin, the chain of clubs was a privately owned business. When I started, I worked for the son of the owner. I wanted to work my way up to General Manager. However, once the Company was sold to a corporation it became a very different place to work. If you’re considering entering health club management, here are a few words of advice.

First, in terms of earning potential, the pay hierarchy is: General Manager, Sales Representative, Fitness Trainer, and lastly Department Head. Yes, a trainer can earn more than his supervisor! If you plan on moving up the ranks, know that Fitness Managers and Group Exercise Directors seldom go on to become executives. A more assured route to becoming the boss is to manage the Club’s facility/operations or to work your way up through the business office.

Middle management for a health club is thankless. One’s staff is paid as employees, but they don’t think of themselves that way. Supervising trainers or class instructors is like herding cats. As part-time personnel, they each consider themselves sole proprietors of the their own time and business; and they must conduct themselves as such in order to survive financially. Their conflict of interest with the Club’s profit goals is inherent in the system and very difficult to manage.

How do you make peace with the conflict of interests?

Above the department head, the executives have their own conflict of interest. One would think that the big bosses want to satisfy customers, the Club members; but that is secondary on their agenda. First and foremost, the corporate club executive aims to increase shareholder value. This places the department head who works for the executive in a tight squeeze, trying to please members and staff while being beholden to a budget that works in the opposite direction.

What advice can you give teachers in this environment?

Professional Image

Unknown.jpegI just heard that one of my colleagues had his Pilates class cancelled because he’s over weight and doesn’t well represent the Club’s brand. I remember thinking the same about a few of our bosses; but the harsh reality is that we, as front line staff, must look the part.

I remember meeting a young trainer who’d just got his first job at an economy gym. He liked playing The Stud, relishing the public adoration; and he questioned my choice of attire. I was wearing a very tailored, matching track suit. He declared that he preferred to walk the gym floor looking ruggedly athletic (i.e. cut-off sleeves, baseball cap, tattoos on display). “I can appreciate the butch fantasy,” I told him, “but I’m not dressing for me. My aim is client sales in a very upscale market. The people who dress like you are more fun; but they can’t afford my services.”

My uniform/costume is not about feeling sexually attractive or wearing the clothes that I like to wear during my own workout. For instance, when I dress to teach dance, I consider the overall environment and the tone of the day. If I feel as though the students have become too casual or unfocused and I want to crack the whip, I’ll drape myself entirely in black, wrists to ankles. If it’s a grey day outside, or if I suspect that the class needs cheering up, I’ll wear bright colors. Either way, like a stage costume, the look is calculated, never left to chance.

How do you know when your emphasis on professional presentation has slid into a sad and insecure practice of conformity or vanity?

We can adjust our body weight and sustain a muscular physique; but age will eventually win out.

What do you do to keep an eye on your own ego?